Disappointment

Stephen and I decided to travel the 40 minutes yesterday to watch Willow’s cross-country race. Genevieve had rung us the night before inviting us, but I wasn’t sure I’d be able to make it as I was expecting a client to phone. However, upon finishing my blog and still no contact, I decided to go after all. The race was at 11.30 but we decided to leave early so that we would be well-positioned for the race.

As we were nearing the turn off, I phoned Genevieve to let her know we would be coming after all and she informed us that my ex, Poppa, would be there as well. ‘’Willow will be so excited to have you all there, ‘’ said Genevieve, who was just off to have a shower before heading out as well. When we arrived at the venue, there were cars lining the road for a good hundred yards, so we took the end spot and made our way towards the activity. We passed Paul’s car and Genevieve pulled up at a vacant spot and joined Stephen and me. As we climbed the last few metres of the hill one of Genevieve’s friends stopped her. ‘’Willow did well,’’ she said.

‘’What do you mean,’’ queried Genevieve. ‘’I thought the race was at 11.30.’’

It turns out Willow ran with the six-year-olds, as the age was taken at January 1st when Willow was still only six. We had all missed the race. Willow was obviously disappointed, especially as she came third and stood on the podium, with none of her family to watch. We were disappointed too and Genevieve felt bad for not reading the email correctly. I had seen a post myself and not picked up on the line that said children will race with the age group they were on January 1st.

But this was more than that as I tried to point out to Genevieve. I know, through my own experiences, that there is always a bigger picture at play. For whatever reason, Willow needed a lesson in disappointment. The only way to get that was to be disappointed. She certainly was yesterday. It didn’t bother me that I had travelled 40 minutes only to have missed the race. I was a little disappointed, but more, sorry for Willow, than anything else.

Through all of my past life work I know that we get examples of the things we need to work on, in childhood. These repeat until we heal them, usually not until we are older and start working on ourselves. To me this is an obvious example of that at play. None of us turned up late deliberately, in fact, we were all there three quarters of an hour earlier than what we thought we needed to be. We all wanted to watch Willow and egg her along. Our intentions had been good, but the outcome had not. Putting this theory to practice I would say that Willow will probably have many more examples of disappointment and has probably had some already before she heals it and it no longer needs to repeat it in her life.

So how does one heal that? I don’t know because that was not one of my issues, but I guess at some stage in her life, she will learn that that disappointment helped shape her character, made her stronger, and created the wonderful person she has now become, the disappointment something to be grateful for. There is always forgiveness involved in this kind of thing too. Perhaps we need to be forgiven for arriving late, or herself, if she carries the disappointment too long.

I can see some readers of this blog saying I am putting too much into this one-off incident and possibly even creating a future reality. To these critics, I would say this is exactly how it works, just like this. I have seen it in my own and others’ lives too many times. When we have an issue as an adult, it is never about that moment, but always stems from a childhood, or series of childhood, instances. It is these that always need to be healed, to heal what is going on for us as an adult. With the knowledge I now have, I can see this clearly at play from the childhood end.