Debt

It is distressing to see how much debt the younger ones carry these days. A hundred thousand debt in my day is more than a million-dollar debt in today’s world. I am not sure if I have already talked about this in a previous blog, I think I have, but we got burnt quite severely, when, as youngsters at just 28 years old, the interest rates climbed from seven per cent to 23%, virtually overnight. We had just bought a second farm and were heavily in debt. That taught me a valuable lesson and that was to be extremely cautious with any future borrowing. And so I was, right throughout the rest of my life. Interest rates had risen once, they could do so again. I always tried to instil this caution into my children, but to them, the eventuality of rapidly-rising interest rates seemed impossible.

I could have borrowed quite heavily again over the years, as those interest rates did remain quite stable, yet over the last year or two they have begun to creep up again. It is not just the interest rates, but the cost of houses in the first place that concerns me. All but one of my children have big debts, including those in Australia. It seems that people today are borrowing with thin margins to accommodate any rising interest or other costs. It is sad when you see your children working so hard and still not able to get ahead.

It was the stress of one of my children that prompted me to write this today. I don’t want to go into detail or share their information but a conversation with this child resulted in an angry flare-up, followed by apologies this morning. We generally have a wonderful relationship and this was totally out of character. I went to sleep, saddened from this outburst and woke up, with the incident being the first thing that came into my consciousness. As the adult, it was me who sent the reconciliatory message first, quickly followed by an ‘I am sorry too’, reply. We are both good, but that stress will still be with that child. When one is facing huge challenges, one needs to know they have backing from those they love and I know that last night, that child would have felt alone. As parents, we never stop loving our children or wanting the best for them or wishing we could take away their pain or their debt for them, to make their lives better. But the reality is, when they leave home, they are on their own to make their own decisions and live by these. All we can do is continue to be there, to be that ear for them to offload to and try and be as supportive as possible, maybe offer our advice, though without expectations that this will be followed or should be followed.

Being a parent is ongoing and I guess it always will be, that is, until we lose our own cognition. And let’s hope that doesn’t happen any time soon. I would much rather carry their burdens than have them carry mine.

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