Top Up
I talked in yesterday’s blog about the noise I encountered on my trip to the Gold Coast. But I would tolerate that noise again and again just to have that quality time I had with the family while over there. That is worth a thousand noises. Now that my youngest two children, two grandchildren and soon to be a third are living in Australia permanently, we don’t see each other nearly as much as we would like. If the children come here, I am not the only person, nor is this the only place they want to visit. Time is precious and trips are short. Even though Stephen and I came home four days early from this recent trip, I really felt topped up and brimming with family love after our visit. One starts to feel an emptiness if one is separated from their children for too long and I suspect this is felt both ways. I know my daughter always says she feels so much better after a visit home, no matter how short it is.
Another sadness is not being around in the day-to-day lives of the grandkids. We do have messaging, but often I talk to their mother while the kids are absent. She co-parents with her former partner, with a one week on, one week off routine in place. Even that situation must be difficult. After I left my husband, I had the kids full-time, with them visiting their father on holidays. As he worked on the farm, it was easy for him to have them at that time. It is far more difficult for the parents of these two children as they both work and all the grandparents are in New Zealand. Whilst I think getting every second week free would be helpful to ensure one doesn’t burn out, it would be difficult finding care during the holidays and not having the children around all the time. As for the kids, they seem extremely adaptable but I bet they wish they could have both parents together with all of them living under the same roof. But such is life.
I have stated this before and I am going to say it again. I do believe our lives are mapped out for us before we are born, with our consent, of course. On a soul level I believe these children would have chosen these circumstances to be born into, knowing that there would come a time when they shared living with their parents, week about. For all of us, it is about making the best of whatever circumstances we find ourselves in. We can approach our world with discontent, or we can find something to be grateful for. Once we start finding one thing, it is surprising how many other things spring to mind.
On that note, I am so grateful for the time I did spend with these families and that my tanks are now full.