Three monkeys and a goat
That’s how we were when we travelled away this past weekend. And it wasn’t just any goat, rather a double goat. In-house jokes can be a pain to those not involved, but it is entertaining for us. Genevieve, Willow and I are all monkeys in the Chinese Zodiac, (birth years 1956, 1992 and 2016) whereas Stephen misses out by only a matter of weeks and is instead a goat. But as his Zodiac sign is that of Capricorn, we call him a double goat. He bemoans the fact that he has to put up with the three chattering monkeys, while we have issue that his stubbornness is magnified times two…as if one goat wouldn’t be bad enough.
Our group travelled to Pukekohe for another Mind, Body, Spirit event on Friday, coming home yesterday. I have talked before about the energy of our foursome, but it is always special and we always have a great time. I chose to attend this event as Stephen used to live in Pukekohe and thus had something to do while the three of us manned the stall. I feel so fortunate that Genevieve offered to help again, as I really do need another person to front the table while I am doing the treatments.
We weren’t as busy as we were in Whangarei and only sold ten books as opposed to the 17 there, but still sales are sales and I am grateful for every one of them. And while I carried out fewer treatments, those that I did do seemed to be significant for the people involved, with one woman finally healing an issue that has dogged her most of her life. People down there seemed to carry a heavy energy, perhaps the result of a longer, wetter winter. It is good if we have been able to impact them in some kind of positive way.
One thing that once again occurred for us is that people are curious. They want to know how we know each other, what brings us together as a group. We find this question is always asked when we are out and about. After all, it is not many 31-year-olds who would be bothered to spend time with us oldies, and this 31-year-old is French. How come the connection, they ask? Genevieve always takes the lead. ‘’This is my mother-in-law,’’ she says in her accented voice, with a kind of slur as the muther-en-ler roles off the tongue. And we laugh. We have plenty of mother-in-law in-house jokes as well. We might be with her friends and she will introduce me as the mother-in-law. And I repeat, pulling a face, ‘’Genevieve and the mother-in-law’’ as if I am an appendage that shouldn’t be there. But the reality is we do get on extremely well and more so when Stephen is with us – just lots and lots of laughter.
But each time that question is asked about our connection, I feel a deep sadness. I want to say to people that the reason we are together is we are bonded by my son, by Genevieve’s fiancé, by Willow’s father, the man we all loved so dearly who is no longer with us. Within each other, we find a piece of the man who has created such a hole in our hearts. That is our bond. But instead, I remain silent, and I laugh instead. We all laugh, as the connotations of a mother-in-law, rattle around us.
How can one be so happy and so sad at the same time? The question always brings back the memory. When my father died when I was 18, I was so very sad, but I used to fake the happiness when I was amongst my friends. Then one day, I realised I really was happy, I was no longer faking. Perhaps this grief that is still buried, will one day go too. And I will hear the question and I might say, ‘’oh, we are bonded by my beautiful son’’ and be happy in the memory.