Fragility of life

We were given a lesson yesterday on the fragility of life. We had been down visiting a sick friend, one who is battling a terminal illness, when, on the way home, we passed another friend’s house that had a couple of police cars parked outside. It turns out the husband had dropped dead earlier that morning. He was elderly, but a sudden death, nonetheless. One never knows what is ahead of them and seeing these two, once healthy men, yesterday, one now dead and the other approaching, it hit home just how fragile life can be.

We will all die, we know that, but we don’t know when our number is up. Just to add to that we are visiting another friend today, one whose husband died a few weeks back.

Notice that these are all men too. There have been a number of deaths lately on the Peninsula and all have been men. I didn’t know most of them, but we are a smallish population and it seems like an awful lot for a small area. But I guess in saying that, the population out here is mostly older people so I guess our stats will be higher than usual. And I do believe, in most stats, that the women generally outlive the men. I wonder what the real reason is that men tend to die before their wives.

I feel for all of these friends, facing their futures without their husbands, their lives having been thrown into disarray. I lived for a long time on my own and I know it is often the little things one misses, like having someone to talk to, to help make decisions – even to just help. There can be a real feeling of loneliness at times too. For those who have nursed their husbands, who is going to nurse them when they become ill or frail?

But I guess in a small community, one does know their neighbours, and people look out for each other. I am sure these friends will receive plenty of help going forwards.

Death of a partner is something most of us will face in the future, just some earlier than others.